Canadian Health Care Mall Discussed ED With Danish Sexologist
Canadian Health Care Mall Discussed ED With Danish Sexologist
Sexuality is more than sex
In the past, doctors believed that men first and foremost became impotent by psychological reasons such as fear of not being good enough or inhibitions that would be solved by prolonged therapy.
Now it is known that the problem in most cases is due to a combination of physical and psychological causes, says Hanne Risor. She is a physician and sexologist at Herlev Hospital, just outside Copenhagen.
Hanne Risor gives advice to men and couples of all ages where the male party has problems with potency. Most get help with their problems. Have impotence natural causes, it may for example be a nerve disease or calcifications in the vessels of the penis.
But also “common” diseases, such as diabetes since childhood, multiple sclerosis (MS), herniated discs or different types of physical handicap which led to lesions in the back, can cause erectile problems.
Some of these men can be helped medically, eg with injection treatment, where man himself injects active substances directly into the penis.
In younger men impotence occurs due to nervousness
The older you get, the more common occurrence of physical causes of impotence. Even quite young men can have erection problems, but for the vast majority of teenagers and young men that have the potency problem it is rooted in nervousness and lack of sexual experience.
He will perhaps be easily startled and afraid of not living up to the partner’s expectations – not least if she is more experienced than him. Or if he lacks self-confidence. Perhaps he has also had bad experiences in the past. 
– In some ways, men are more vulnerable than women. We women should not perform any visible evidence, says Hanne Risor and emphasizes that the role of women and her understanding or lack of it plays a vital role in the man’s erection.
Power struggles can cause problems with erection
Men between 25 and 40 have rarely erection problems because of nervousness or fear of not being good enough. Often, they live a regular life with a steady partner.
- But the male mid-life often gets troublesome in terms of erections, if there are breaks in the balance of power in the relationship. Or if the woman thinks that he does not satisfy her properly. Or if the partner is promiscuous, says Hanne Risor.
There are, for example, men who have problems with potency after they experienced a divorce because of the partner’s infidelity. Now they are moving into a new relationship, but potency problem often accompanies.
When men reach the age of 40-50 there are formed small calcifications in the blood vessels in the penis. Calcification increases affect the blood supply and thus the erection. The penis does not get stiff as easily as it did before. It often needs to be stimulated physically to become rigid, and there may be problems with keeping an erection throughout sexual intercourse through.
Women often don’t know when it is a good time for some additional physical stimulation. And women may have problems because they are worried that the man’s erection failure means he is no longer turned on by her, says Hanne Risor.
Exercises can break the vicious circle
A man experiences his erection failure as a personal defeat and becomes afraid it will repeat itself. It can develop into a vicious circle that best broken by the pair talk about the problem.
Hanne Risor recommends also that the couple avoids intercourse for a while and stick to petting and sensory exercises, where the objective is simply to enjoy the presence and of each other.
The man and woman are encouraged to perform exercises according to certain rules in peace and quiet at home in a place where they can concentrate fully on each other and relax.
- The aim of the exercises is not to get excited by each other or giving each other orgasms. Instead, it’s about being able to feel, give and take, and to enjoy togetherness. This is the way to rediscover desire and to practice communicating without words. And there is no answer, underlines Hanne Risor. If he gets a hard-on it is good – if he does not get erection, it is also good.
- Many people focus on reaching an incredible orgasm. But what they forget is that emotional aspect of physicality can be so beautiful, says Hanne Risors. Some couples need to do the exercises two or three times before erection problems disappear, or they have found their way back to each other. Others need months before there is an improvement.
-There are often problems in other spheres of everyday life, which we must take up, says Hanne Risor.
If a man has no ability to get an erection in one way or another, Hanne Risor gives her advice on how he and his partner can continue to have a sex life together, for instance by using different tools. Men can actually ejaculate even if the penis is not rigid. Sexual intercourse is not the only way to enjoy sex.
Professional help is the best way out of the problem
Hanne Risor always recommends couples with potency problems to seek professional sexological help. If you are finding fault with each other, it will not be long until you get into a locked position and it can be difficult to know how to get on, if you do not have a neutral person to help.
She claims that impotence is also about how to live together as a couple. If you remember to give each other hugs and have close contact. For example if you take the time to eat breakfast together. It’s about quality of life.
– If you are careless to nurture your relationship and believe that everything will probably work out by itself, you are in denial which is not going to help, says Hanne Risor for conclusion.
